Watch out Mike and Tim, Mango the Chimpanzee has announced he is running for 4th Ward city council. Mango is dodging the Operation Trust thingy or whatever it is called and is offering banana's and not cash to get people to vote for him.
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Stevens University and St Peters College 1st to have NCAA Jello Wrestling teams
9-28-10
Hoboken, NJ
Stevens University in Hoboken and St Peters College in Jersey city both announced today that they are the 1st to colleges in the USA to participate in NCAA sanctioned collegiate Jello Wrestling. The first match will take place October 8th 2010 at Stevens.
"We will have cherry jello since our colors are red" added Ath Dir of Stevens. St. Peter's who's color is blue will use Blueberry jello.
Christine Dumont of Stevens said "I am an engineering major and a real dork. I always dreamed of joining a college sport and this is a sport where I can really do some damage. St. Peter's has no chance"
Rosie Nunez of St. Peter's college added "Yo, fucks that bitch in Hoboken. I'm gonna mess that lil white girl up yo".
The action starts at 8. Be there. Admission is free
Hoboken, NJ
Stevens University in Hoboken and St Peters College in Jersey city both announced today that they are the 1st to colleges in the USA to participate in NCAA sanctioned collegiate Jello Wrestling. The first match will take place October 8th 2010 at Stevens.
"We will have cherry jello since our colors are red" added Ath Dir of Stevens. St. Peter's who's color is blue will use Blueberry jello.
Christine Dumont of Stevens said "I am an engineering major and a real dork. I always dreamed of joining a college sport and this is a sport where I can really do some damage. St. Peter's has no chance"
Rosie Nunez of St. Peter's college added "Yo, fucks that bitch in Hoboken. I'm gonna mess that lil white girl up yo".
The action starts at 8. Be there. Admission is free
Sunday, September 26, 2010
Update!! Guido's banned from coming to Hoboken bars
Hoboken, NJ
On 9-26-10 50 all 181 Hoboken bar and restaurant owners met at the gymnasium at the local high school to vote on a Guido allowance vote for Hoboken. The vote was to determine whether or not, in general Hoboken bars and restaurants should allow meat heads in establishments
The vote was 91 Nay and 90 Yes therefore determining that GUIDOS are no longer allowed to come to Hoboken to go out.
Note from the editor: Attention meat heads, yes it is true, you are no longer allowed entry to any bars in Hoboken, stay in Bayonne and Lodi, your money is no good here.
Victoria Beckham spotted in Hoboken, NJ 9-26-10 Confirmed
Thank you reader Samantha for sending us this additional picture. Unless someone is mentally very sick to dress and look like Victoria Beckham and get VB engraved on the seats of a Bentley then this is indeed here. If anyone knows why she was here, please email us or comment.
Victoria Beckham spotted in Hoboken, NJ 9-26-10
Hoboken, NJ
Victoria Beckham was spotted at 2:32 pm today in Hoboken, NJ. A reader of Bizarre Hoboken sent us the image above. In all honesty it does look like her, we will let you be the judge.
Victoria was photographed leaving a side entrance at the W hotel. No further info is available as to why she was here if indeed this is her?
Hoboken Police to Get Hot Air Balloon w Bungee Capabilities to fight local crime
9-26-10
The city of Hoboken, NJ is considering using a hot air balloon with a bungee cord attached to fight local crime. A reliable source tells Bizarre Hoboken that this new addition to the local fight against crime will likely come during the 2011 St Patrick's Day parade.
It is being learned that the balloon will be used only during the St. Patricks Day parade aka (Lets get drunk and piss on your bushes day). The balloon will be shaped like a giant 4 leaf clover and will house a driver and an officer attached to a bungee cord. The balloon will hover over men and ladies urinating in public and the officer will jump out of the balloon and catch the suspect in the act. "The pissers will never know what hit them" says one source close to the idea.
"We will get them on the way down and read them their right on the way up. We will handcuff them in the balloon and get 3 or 4 at a time and then hover over the Hudson and drop them in the water to a waiting canoe that will fish these derelicts out of the water and take them to HQ's" says another anonymous agreer to the idea.
Watch out people!
Hoboken, NJ
The city of Hoboken, NJ is considering using a hot air balloon with a bungee cord attached to fight local crime. A reliable source tells Bizarre Hoboken that this new addition to the local fight against crime will likely come during the 2011 St Patrick's Day parade.
It is being learned that the balloon will be used only during the St. Patricks Day parade aka (Lets get drunk and piss on your bushes day). The balloon will be shaped like a giant 4 leaf clover and will house a driver and an officer attached to a bungee cord. The balloon will hover over men and ladies urinating in public and the officer will jump out of the balloon and catch the suspect in the act. "The pissers will never know what hit them" says one source close to the idea.
"We will get them on the way down and read them their right on the way up. We will handcuff them in the balloon and get 3 or 4 at a time and then hover over the Hudson and drop them in the water to a waiting canoe that will fish these derelicts out of the water and take them to HQ's" says another anonymous agreer to the idea.
Watch out people!
Hoboken to add gondola service 2012
Hoboken, NJ
A 12-0 vote last Thursday has paved the way to welcome a new gondola service that will connect Jersey City Heights, Hoboken, Manhattan and Brooklyn. Jooris Neilander of Swedish owned Gondola Swiss LLC approached all local participants with the idea and was met with open arms this week. "This is a great addition to our community" added one local Hoboken official. "With PATH trains full of drunken hooligans, fist pumpers and perverts with camera phones, this gondola service will make for getting in to the city easier and more enjoyable" add Jooris Neilander.
The proposed system will start on the cliffs in the heights and continue to the top of the W hotel, then to Chelsea Piers, then over all of Manhattan and finishing in Dumbo Brooklyn. Estimated costs are in the 1.5-2.5 billion dollar range. Tickets will be based on zones. $12 per zone is the anticipated cost. JCH to Dumbo is only $36. For an added bonus, there will be a giant slide that goes from the top of the W to street level or users can opt to use the W elevators.
"I am really geared up for this. I just hate getting on the PATH these days. I always find myself next to either someone who farts all the time or I find myself next to a girl who tells her other 5 girlfriends all about the guys she has blown in Manasquan over the summer".
"The new gondola will eliminate vehicles in the Mile Square city" added one Hoboken official. The gondolas are reported to be the highest tech gondolas out there. "Free TV, Free Net, Free Rubbers" claims Neilander.
Construction is set to begin in January 2011.
Saturday, September 25, 2010
Hoboken to Build Airport in 2014. Monroe Street to be eliminated.
9-25-10
Hoboken, NJ
Local Hoboken officials are meeting secretly this week to discuss the possibilities of placing a regional airport in the Mile Square city in 2014. Monroe Street is the intended area of construction and residents will be forced to move and sell property if the deal is made.
"An airport in Hoboken is essential and will bring much needed revenue to the Mile Square city. Today, people must get in cabs and take an 18 minute ride to Newark. With so many Hoboken residents always flying for work we feel that an airport capable of handling Embraer's, 707's, 727's and Gulfstream jets would be essential for the town and an added bonus for those considering living in Jersey City as opposed to Hoboken. Now you no longer have to take that 18 minute ride, you just walk to the airport" says one official.
The proposed area that the airport will cover is Monroe St from Observer to 10th St. Both side of houses and apartments on Monroe St will be eliminated. Jet Blue representative Richard Face says " We intend on buying out every resident with large sums of money". When asked how will this airport work Face responded with "Observer to 10th gives us 3500 feet, enough for several small jets. This will essentially be a strip therefore one plane takes off and one lands and so on. The terminal will be quite small and narrow and there will be no parking".
Local resident Betty Vanzianetti is up in arms over the proposed idea. "They can't even fix a fucking pothole and they want to build an airport?". Another resident who wishes to remain anonymous said "This is a great idea, Newark is in a way pretty far and personally I work a lot in other cities. If this happens it will make Hoboken such a cool place to live".
Calls to officials with regards to this story were not available at press time. We will continue to update this story as information is made available.
Hoboken, NJ
Local Hoboken officials are meeting secretly this week to discuss the possibilities of placing a regional airport in the Mile Square city in 2014. Monroe Street is the intended area of construction and residents will be forced to move and sell property if the deal is made.
"An airport in Hoboken is essential and will bring much needed revenue to the Mile Square city. Today, people must get in cabs and take an 18 minute ride to Newark. With so many Hoboken residents always flying for work we feel that an airport capable of handling Embraer's, 707's, 727's and Gulfstream jets would be essential for the town and an added bonus for those considering living in Jersey City as opposed to Hoboken. Now you no longer have to take that 18 minute ride, you just walk to the airport" says one official.
The proposed area that the airport will cover is Monroe St from Observer to 10th St. Both side of houses and apartments on Monroe St will be eliminated. Jet Blue representative Richard Face says " We intend on buying out every resident with large sums of money". When asked how will this airport work Face responded with "Observer to 10th gives us 3500 feet, enough for several small jets. This will essentially be a strip therefore one plane takes off and one lands and so on. The terminal will be quite small and narrow and there will be no parking".
Local resident Betty Vanzianetti is up in arms over the proposed idea. "They can't even fix a fucking pothole and they want to build an airport?". Another resident who wishes to remain anonymous said "This is a great idea, Newark is in a way pretty far and personally I work a lot in other cities. If this happens it will make Hoboken such a cool place to live".
Calls to officials with regards to this story were not available at press time. We will continue to update this story as information is made available.
Steven's Univ man awakes and finds 38 yr old female in his bed
9-25-10
Hoboken, NJ
At 6:04 am today, Steven's University security was called to a local Hoboken apt where a student had called in a report of a break in. 21 year old Danny Yantiff of Hoboken, NJ told local security that as he woke up to use the restroom, he found an unknown woman in his bed.
Police woke up 38 yr old Nancy Figlioni of Brooklyn, NY and placed her under arrest. As the suspect was being read her rights she told police "I did not break in, I met Danny at Rogo's last night. We were doing shots all night. Around 1215am Danny grabbed me and told me 'I'm taking you home to fuck your brains out' ".
Authorities then started questioning Mr. Yantiff. "Sir, take one look at this lady, I'm 21 years old and hang with sorority girls all day long, you really think I need to be banging some half rate Milf?".
After authorities reviewed camera footage from the bar, Mr. Yantiff was arrested and charged with lying and filing a false report. Officer Michaels of campus security said "We have reviewed the tapes and find that Mr. Yantiff knowingly invited this lady to his home. It can be overheard on the bar footage 'Baby, you get hotter and hotter with every drink I swallow, now I want to give you something else to swallow"
Mr. Yantiff will face school disciplinary action this week. Mrs. Figlioni left the scene without further comment wearing just 1 shoe and torn panty hose.
At 6:04 am today, Steven's University security was called to a local Hoboken apt where a student had called in a report of a break in. 21 year old Danny Yantiff of Hoboken, NJ told local security that as he woke up to use the restroom, he found an unknown woman in his bed.
Police woke up 38 yr old Nancy Figlioni of Brooklyn, NY and placed her under arrest. As the suspect was being read her rights she told police "I did not break in, I met Danny at Rogo's last night. We were doing shots all night. Around 1215am Danny grabbed me and told me 'I'm taking you home to fuck your brains out' ".
Authorities then started questioning Mr. Yantiff. "Sir, take one look at this lady, I'm 21 years old and hang with sorority girls all day long, you really think I need to be banging some half rate Milf?".
After authorities reviewed camera footage from the bar, Mr. Yantiff was arrested and charged with lying and filing a false report. Officer Michaels of campus security said "We have reviewed the tapes and find that Mr. Yantiff knowingly invited this lady to his home. It can be overheard on the bar footage 'Baby, you get hotter and hotter with every drink I swallow, now I want to give you something else to swallow"
Mr. Yantiff will face school disciplinary action this week. Mrs. Figlioni left the scene without further comment wearing just 1 shoe and torn panty hose.
Friday, September 24, 2010
Hoboken considering using clowns on unicycles to write parking tickets
9-24-10
Hoboken, NJ
Inside sources close to Bizarre Hoboken have learned that the Hoboken Parking Utility may start using clowns on unicycles to wrote parking tickets. Local officials feel that it is too easy to spot an HPU officer hence allowing people to run to the meters and drop in quarters before the agents get there.
"We are losing a lot of money at the meters. We need to figure out a way to fool the public" says one official.
Clowns are friendly characters and many people get lots of laughs. Local people will never suspect that a clown on a unicycle is actually writing parking tickets and no standing zone tickets.
"We want to take existing HPU agents and train them in unicycling and clown acting and send them on their way. Our agents, 12 hours a day walk up and down and all around the city and we feel that being dressed up in a silly suit with some make up on and give them a mode of reliable transportation will make them want to work harder" added another local official.
Zog Sports to add Jousting and Russian Roulette to activities
Hoboken, NJ
Zog Sports has added 2 new activities to it's menu for Hoboken residents to compete in. "These 2 new activities will add some real excitement to our leagues. Since we're more known for laid back, no brain sports, these 2 new additions will really make for great challenges" says a Zog official in a recent interview this morning.
"We listen to our customers. There was some feedback that the sports we offer now were either too easy or just another way for guys with no lives to look at girls in little short shorts. We have now raised the bar and we think a lot more people will take part in the added games".
Additional clauses will need to be signed before participants will be able to either Joust or hold and or use any provided revolver.
Michael Norris, 27 of Hoboken said "I love Zog sports. I take pictures of all the girls out there playing and then print them at home and tell all the guys at my office 'this is my girlfriend' " "These new additions are really great ideas. I sure hope that 1 jock on our team kills himself with the first squeeze of the trigger".
Zog has purchased 6 horses and 4 hand guns for now. "Depending on how many more people we get to sign up will determine future purchases" added a Zog official.
Federal indictments for Hoboken Bar Trivia Cheaters
Newark, NJ
Federal prosecutors in Newark, NJ this morning have indicted 5 Hoboken residents on charges of cheating during Hoboken Bar Trivia contests over the last 4 years. Federal prosecutor's charge Brian Jablonski, Sam Daniels, Ted "My sweater is always too tight" Johnson, Amanda Ippolito and Dawn Trindowitz with a 376 count indictment.
"We will not allow average citizens to be duped out of Coors Light T Shirts, bottles of wine and $40 bar tabs because some people find it OK to use their PDA's and cell phones to get correct answers".
A local trivia question asker tipped off federal authorities in 2009. "I couldn't believe the same 5 people would win every Wednesday night. I then watched the bar's surveillance tape one night and saw these people using their PDA's under the table. They played the part right and acted as if but every 12 seconds one of them would glance down under the table and thats when I saw a Blackberry" said an anonymous source close to the investigation.
In early 2010 federal prosecutors obtained a warrant to place tracers on each of the 5 defendants cell phones. "Monday through Thursday nights, each PDA would have dozens of google requests while Friday through Sunday there would be no requests. We knew that since Trivia is only played in Hoboken Mon-Thur, we would have a solid case against the defendants" added prosecutor Dean Thomas.
Yesterday 12 federal agents stormed the residences of all 5 suspects with search warrants. Agents have told Bizarre Hoboken that they have seized over 100 Hornitos T Shirts, 40 Sam Adams beach chairs, numerous branded shot glasses and stacks of local gift cards ranging in value.
"We believe that over the last 4 years these defendants have accumulated nearly $24,000 in ill gotten bar tabs". added Dean Thomas
Federal Magistrate John Taylor has remanded all the defendants on a never before seen bail. A reporter associated with Bizarre Hoboken heard the judge tell all 5 defendants "I am going to remand all the defendants until they can answer this 10 question quiz I have drawn up". Since PDA's are not allowed in the jail where the defendants are now in custody, it may be awhile before they see the light of day.
Thursday, September 23, 2010
All Hoboken bars mandate $5 cover charge on weekends to Guidos
9-23-10
Hoboken, NJ
Watch out Guido's and Guidette's! Hoboken, NJ politicians have signed a bill that mandates bouncers to charge a $5 door tax to anyone that comes to Hoboken Friday after 5pm all day Saturday and all day Sunday that looks like a Guido or a Guidette.
A 4 page memo was released to all club and bar owners that defines what either a guido or guidette will or could look like. The $5 surcharge is across the board in Hoboken, therefore those Goomba's who think they have half a brain and try to enter a dive bar to beat the surcharge will be sadly mistaken.
The official report from city hall stipulates the following:
Charge $5 to anyone that
Has gel in their hair
Has a wife beater on
Has a large gold necklace
Has a bigger nose than you
Has Dakkar or Cool Water on
Keeps wiping their nose every 60 seconds (call cops too)
Has a Clifton, NJ drivers license
Has a first name that ends in A or I (girls only)
Makes girls squeeze their muscles while on line
Has less than 10 dollars cash in wallet
Local visitors are all up in arms over this new debacle. Vinny Russopetrocinocalamari from Belville says "Are you frigggggin serious? Yo, I am Mannasquan's finest example of true Italiano. If this stays in effect I may be declined to tell my uncle Paulie who knows this guy Vinny who back in 2002 knew this guy named Carmine who lived in Hoboken and had this roommate named Joey who knew this guy named Pasquale that knew this girl Maria and Maria will tell Gina who knows Paula and Paula will fuck diz shitttt up yo!!"
Local uptown diner owner Bobby Apostolopocostodosopolus the XXIVth disagrees with the town imposing the Aqua Net user tax clause. "This is ratshit!! I have a diner with a bar. Now all my disco fries eating customers will go away. Many people have big noses, Italians, the jews, us greeks. How can I, for sure, know who is a Guido?"
Town hall has not returned our calls for an answer.
Hoboken, NJ
Watch out Guido's and Guidette's! Hoboken, NJ politicians have signed a bill that mandates bouncers to charge a $5 door tax to anyone that comes to Hoboken Friday after 5pm all day Saturday and all day Sunday that looks like a Guido or a Guidette.
A 4 page memo was released to all club and bar owners that defines what either a guido or guidette will or could look like. The $5 surcharge is across the board in Hoboken, therefore those Goomba's who think they have half a brain and try to enter a dive bar to beat the surcharge will be sadly mistaken.
The official report from city hall stipulates the following:
Charge $5 to anyone that
Has gel in their hair
Has a wife beater on
Has a large gold necklace
Has a bigger nose than you
Has Dakkar or Cool Water on
Keeps wiping their nose every 60 seconds (call cops too)
Has a Clifton, NJ drivers license
Has a first name that ends in A or I (girls only)
Makes girls squeeze their muscles while on line
Has less than 10 dollars cash in wallet
Local visitors are all up in arms over this new debacle. Vinny Russopetrocinocalamari from Belville says "Are you frigggggin serious? Yo, I am Mannasquan's finest example of true Italiano. If this stays in effect I may be declined to tell my uncle Paulie who knows this guy Vinny who back in 2002 knew this guy named Carmine who lived in Hoboken and had this roommate named Joey who knew this guy named Pasquale that knew this girl Maria and Maria will tell Gina who knows Paula and Paula will fuck diz shitttt up yo!!"
Local uptown diner owner Bobby Apostolopocostodosopolus the XXIVth disagrees with the town imposing the Aqua Net user tax clause. "This is ratshit!! I have a diner with a bar. Now all my disco fries eating customers will go away. Many people have big noses, Italians, the jews, us greeks. How can I, for sure, know who is a Guido?"
Town hall has not returned our calls for an answer.
False Bomb Scare in Hoboken, Police say it was an egg timer
9-22-10
Mildred Herman, a 94 year old Hoboken woman called police to her 11th St apartment yesterday to report a possible bomb. Jersey City Bomb Squad was called in to canvas the apartment. "There is a loud ticking noise coming from my kitchen" said Mildred Herman to 911 Operator. Upon arriving at the scene, police found an egg timer on Ms. Herman's counter and a pot roast in the oven.
Police considered there to be no immediate threat of an explosive device. Police believe due to Mrs. Herman's age, she must have forgot about her dinner and suspected the ticking noise to be a possible bomb.
When Bizarre Hoboken asked Mrs. Herman what had happened in her kitchen she told us "Well I just got back from voting and I sure hope that Richard Nixon wins this election."
Mildred Herman, a 94 year old Hoboken woman called police to her 11th St apartment yesterday to report a possible bomb. Jersey City Bomb Squad was called in to canvas the apartment. "There is a loud ticking noise coming from my kitchen" said Mildred Herman to 911 Operator. Upon arriving at the scene, police found an egg timer on Ms. Herman's counter and a pot roast in the oven.
Police considered there to be no immediate threat of an explosive device. Police believe due to Mrs. Herman's age, she must have forgot about her dinner and suspected the ticking noise to be a possible bomb.
When Bizarre Hoboken asked Mrs. Herman what had happened in her kitchen she told us "Well I just got back from voting and I sure hope that Richard Nixon wins this election."
Hair Salons replacing scissors with Flowbees, sign of our times
9-21-10
Hoboken, NJ
With the current state of our economy, many local hair salon owners are now eliminating the purchase of expensive hair scissors (some cost over $200 per piece) with Flowbee devices. It looks like owners and stylists are all feeling the financial crunch by making the switch.
Local stylist Guy G. says "Each year I probably spend $2500 on a variety of scissors. Ever since I picked up the Flowbee at a garage sale at the Tea Building, I have saved a lot of money and time in the salon. The average cut takes about 25 minutes with scissors, the Flowbee takes 4 minutes". "I wish I believed in the Flowbee growing up, I always thought of it as a sex toy for people that had lazy fists" added Guy G.
Lonnie Gerard of another Hoboken salon said "In 2010 vintage is the new thing. Scissors are so 2009. Many of my clients are so happy I broke my Flowbee out of from under my bed".
Lisa T. of Hoboken who frequents a salon that has resorted to the Flowbee told Bizarre Hoboken " The Flowbee is the best, it is so quick. Yeah it pulls on my hairs a little but I'm out of the chair in 5 minutes. This gives me another 20 minutes to push my double wide stroller while I text all my girlfriends".
It appears the Flowbee is making a huge comeback in Hoboken. Many other salons are considering following suit.
Submitted by senior staff writer Phil Theegrave who demonstrates the proper way to use a Flowbee. Photo credit: Phil's Mom
Hoboken, NJ
With the current state of our economy, many local hair salon owners are now eliminating the purchase of expensive hair scissors (some cost over $200 per piece) with Flowbee devices. It looks like owners and stylists are all feeling the financial crunch by making the switch.
Local stylist Guy G. says "Each year I probably spend $2500 on a variety of scissors. Ever since I picked up the Flowbee at a garage sale at the Tea Building, I have saved a lot of money and time in the salon. The average cut takes about 25 minutes with scissors, the Flowbee takes 4 minutes". "I wish I believed in the Flowbee growing up, I always thought of it as a sex toy for people that had lazy fists" added Guy G.
Lonnie Gerard of another Hoboken salon said "In 2010 vintage is the new thing. Scissors are so 2009. Many of my clients are so happy I broke my Flowbee out of from under my bed".
Lisa T. of Hoboken who frequents a salon that has resorted to the Flowbee told Bizarre Hoboken " The Flowbee is the best, it is so quick. Yeah it pulls on my hairs a little but I'm out of the chair in 5 minutes. This gives me another 20 minutes to push my double wide stroller while I text all my girlfriends".
It appears the Flowbee is making a huge comeback in Hoboken. Many other salons are considering following suit.
Hoboken yellow cabs now outfitted with gas masks for passengers
9-20-10
Transportation offices - Hoboken, NJ
A press release was made available today to local media to announce that all Hoboken yellow cabs will each be outfitted with 3 gas masks for riders to use if they feel the need to. Local city hall employees have been at the brunt of many recent complaints that Hoboken cab drivers smell like old milk amongst other terms. Representatives for the town transportation department are using this gas mask idea temporarily until better measures can be made and worked in to the towns seemingly never ending surplus.
Local resident Kristen said this morning "This idea is fantastic. On 9-14-10 at 5:56pm I got in cab #54 at the PATH train and my driver smelled really bad. I had to hold my nose all the way to the Shipyard.
Mike Davis, another Hoboken resident said "I am so happy to hear this news. I was starting to think that these guys were washing once a week out of bed pans."
Effective 9-24-10 riders may request the cab driver to "pop the trunk" to gain access to masks. "There is no added surcharge to use these masks" said city officials. "We want our residents to be taken to their destinations as pleasantly as possible. We will continue to make new strides to make riding in our shit smelling taxis better in the months to come".
Written by Jim Shortz
Transportation offices - Hoboken, NJ
A press release was made available today to local media to announce that all Hoboken yellow cabs will each be outfitted with 3 gas masks for riders to use if they feel the need to. Local city hall employees have been at the brunt of many recent complaints that Hoboken cab drivers smell like old milk amongst other terms. Representatives for the town transportation department are using this gas mask idea temporarily until better measures can be made and worked in to the towns seemingly never ending surplus.
Local resident Kristen said this morning "This idea is fantastic. On 9-14-10 at 5:56pm I got in cab #54 at the PATH train and my driver smelled really bad. I had to hold my nose all the way to the Shipyard.
Mike Davis, another Hoboken resident said "I am so happy to hear this news. I was starting to think that these guys were washing once a week out of bed pans."
Effective 9-24-10 riders may request the cab driver to "pop the trunk" to gain access to masks. "There is no added surcharge to use these masks" said city officials. "We want our residents to be taken to their destinations as pleasantly as possible. We will continue to make new strides to make riding in our shit smelling taxis better in the months to come".
Local restaurant Robongi does away with car delivery for eco friendly roller skates
9-20-10
Hoboken, NJ
In an effort to keep Washington Street safer and less congested, local eatery Robongi will do away with vehicles on October 1st, 2010 and utilize Roller Skates to make all deliveries. Restaurant manager Ivan had this to say. "We have received a lot of complaints for local residents that we use Washington St. as our own personal driveway and that we double park too much, take naps in our cars and congregate on other peoples property to read, play cards and look at naked lady books. While all of this is true, we want to make a change and appear in a better spotlight".
Delivery drivers are outraged by the sudden news. Hang T. En of Queens, NY who currently uses his car to deliver said "This is outrageous. How am I going to nap now? Shit, I don't even know how to roller skate".
Another driver who wishes to remain anonymous said "Ivan has told us that in the winter time we will have to use cross country skies to get around town. I am appalled at these new rules and many of us are planning on quitting, we're gonna get jobs at Cluck U Chicken and use our cars."
Local Hoboken resident Mike O'Malley said "This is a great idea!! I live across the street from Robongi and when I peek out my window at night all I see is a nightly game of poker being played on the hoods of 7 Hondas. Their action to relieve traffic from the street and at the same time allow drivers to burn some calories is a fantastic idea, I applaud management".
A strike is being planned for this Saturday by the drivers. We will update this story as we learn more details.
Hoboken, NJ
In an effort to keep Washington Street safer and less congested, local eatery Robongi will do away with vehicles on October 1st, 2010 and utilize Roller Skates to make all deliveries. Restaurant manager Ivan had this to say. "We have received a lot of complaints for local residents that we use Washington St. as our own personal driveway and that we double park too much, take naps in our cars and congregate on other peoples property to read, play cards and look at naked lady books. While all of this is true, we want to make a change and appear in a better spotlight".
Delivery drivers are outraged by the sudden news. Hang T. En of Queens, NY who currently uses his car to deliver said "This is outrageous. How am I going to nap now? Shit, I don't even know how to roller skate".
Another driver who wishes to remain anonymous said "Ivan has told us that in the winter time we will have to use cross country skies to get around town. I am appalled at these new rules and many of us are planning on quitting, we're gonna get jobs at Cluck U Chicken and use our cars."
Local Hoboken resident Mike O'Malley said "This is a great idea!! I live across the street from Robongi and when I peek out my window at night all I see is a nightly game of poker being played on the hoods of 7 Hondas. Their action to relieve traffic from the street and at the same time allow drivers to burn some calories is a fantastic idea, I applaud management".
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